An Interview with The Diet Mentor
I met the Diet Mentor on a cold day in August 1993 on Hampstead Heath. It had been raining and the leaves looked like they might soon be turning. It was a strange year, it had been a washout. Much like 2007, poor old Tewkesbury Upon Avon is now Tewkesbury-in-Avon. I feel so sorry for those poor folks. Anyway it had been raining all day and it was about four o’clock in the afternoon.
I stood shuffling from foot to foot pondering on the nature of diet. I was extremely over weight at the time and was actually rather hungry, looking forward to my third Big Mac of the day. All of a sudden a huge elephantine man came walking towards me. He had a big bushy beard and wore a hat like Gandalf’s, the beard was somewhat grey and tobacco stained. He smiled widely beneath the bristles showing yellow stained teeth. He carried a part eaten and part wrapped burger in one hand and a carton of coke in the other. His dark green tweed jacket was so big the weight of the cloth made the pockets hang half way down his tree trunk thighs. These looked more tree like than they otherwise might given that they were cocooned in dark brown corduroy that flapped as he walked. The sheer size of him reminded me of a chestnut tree.
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